Day 33

The I am feeling better mode is continuing. Though I get tired quite easily it's nice to be able to go out and have some fresh air in the sunshine.

One of the things the Oncologist told me was that if the chemotherapy was working I would start to notice that swallowing food would be easier. Sadly I have to report that the kind of things I used to struggle with before are still causing me the same discomfort. This has set me thinking about the point of taking all these pills. As you will have gathered if you have been regularly reading this blog I have been through several difficult days. Now I always knew that chemo wouldn't be anything other than a hard slog. The Oncologist did tell me that there was a 50% chance of it working. So I can't claim that I went into this with my eyes shut.

Thing is as the second session comes to a close if it has thus far had no real impact will the third dose make anything different? If the answer to that is yes then let's proceed and I shall deal with it. On the other hand if it is not going to do anything is there any point in proceeding down this line? This is not intended as a negative thought at all. The Consultant in Southampton told us that provided the tumor had not grown the operation would proceed anyway. I have been wondering therefore whether it might be a thought to have an early CT Scan and if necessary have the operation earlier than planned.

In an effort to put these thoughts into some perspective I have e mailed the Upper GI Nurse Joya with my concerns. I am due to see the Oncologist the day before I am due to have yet more needles stuck in my arm and I am hoping that before the appointment she will be aware of my feelings.

I hope dear reader you don't think I am giving up. This is far from the case. My niece knows someone who has had Oesophageal Cancer. She will contact him and I hope to have a chat. It could well be that before I go back to Hospital I may have a different view. At least I shall have a few days away from the pills to take stock. After all it is my body and I have I hope some choices in this matter.

On a lighter note this folically challenged person has not lost what little hair he has left. I had noticed it growing a little unkempt but put off going to the Barber as I thought if it was going to fall out anyway I could save myself £7. I gave up on that idea. Neither wonder I am not a millionaire.