Day 211

I woke up afetr a disturbed night at 730 this morning and yes it was still raining. As you are probably aware I like to wlk to the Newsagents but today I gave up and took the car. I took a brief look at the Solent this morning. The tide was in and the waves were crashing against the sea wall. However with the wind blowing it felt rather cold. True to the weather forecast it cleared up this afternoon and with a clear sky tonight we are promised some frost. Andrea reports that on a key hill for Island Trafic there appeared to be a burst water pipe which with the freezing temperatures could amke for an interesting drive in the morning.

You will note I have not mentioned food for the last day or so. Things are getting a bit easier now in the sense that I am starting to know a lot more about what I can and can't eat. For example of all the types of Pasta Spaghetti is the one that causes the least problem. I also think I am becoming a lot more realsitic in terms of what is possible. The main thing to remember is that I don't feel under nourished and at no time have I been sick.

Finally I forgot to mention in my blog of a few days ago that Emily told me she didn't believe in Father Christmas. What a calamity I mean she is 8 years old and all that but is nothing sacred?

Day 210

The weather continues to be vile and yes I got soaked on my way back from the Newsagents.

I had a very productive morning in putting together the music for my show on Tuesday. My guests will be from an organisation called Link. They are part of a nationwide group seeking to find out what we think of the work of Social Services and the NHS. It should make for an informative interview. One question that intrigues me is who funds this organisation? And the other puzzle is does anyone in authority take any notice? To find out more listen either on 91.5FM or on line.

This afternoon I watched far more Football than is good for me. Am I already a couch potato?

Healthwise it's been an okay day. I had another decent night's sleep. To some extent I am treading water until we find out what if anything the medical people suggest. More perhaps tomorrow.

Day 209

It has been a very good day. I am definitely coughing a lot less. Ev and I were talking about this and she wondered whether one cause of my difficulties was that I wasn't drinking enough. It may just be a coincidence but since increasing my liquid in take the cough has decreased in intensity. Last night was one of my better ones in terms of sleeping in that I managed almost 8 hours in the land of nod.

Today was a busy time in that not only the local church had its Christmas Fayre so did the school. Our presence was required in both locations. I thoroughly enjoyed both events. The Church had a festival of decorated Christmas trees one of which was all the work of Ev. It definitely helped the feeling of Christmas is coming.

My Son in Law is a dedicated Tottenham Hotspur fan and their match with Aston Villa was on ESPN which we have and he does not. We had tea in our house so we could watch.

Let's hope tomorrow continues the improvement.

Day 208

A number of very positive things have happened today. The best one came early evening. I have made mention of Joya many times on this blog. You may recall that when I went for my Endoscopy 9 days ago I was told that the Biopsy would take 4 weeks to come through(sorry that should have read the Biopsy Results. Anyway Joya said she thought this was too long and she would chase it up. Bless her she got the information today. There are no malignant cells to be found. The Medicos seem to think that my eating problems and presumably coughing are as a result of an inflammation and nothing more. Joya's opposite number in Southampton(Donna) is going to speak with the Consultant who operated on me as to what should happen next. The hope is that whatever needs doing can be carried out before Christmas. We shall see.

What else? Well today Ev was going to Shropshire on the train to meet up with Andrea and friends from when we lived in that delightful neck of the woods. The ferry over was very busy but as it was one of the old ones it meant we could all get on. Ev's train left on time and two minutes later there was a power cut at the station and every thing stopped. I have since heard that she arrived in Shrewsbury on schedule.

Earlier in the day we had seen Grand Daughter Emily in school assembly. She spoke up very well.

Jools Holland's Band are appearing at the Guildhall in Portsmouth on 21 December. I rather feared I had left it too late to book. I went to the Box Office and was told it was a sell out but as luck would have it two tickets had been returned this morning so I got them. I have seen one of Jools' shows before but Ev has not. The shows are great fun and with Christmas upon us it should have an added ingredient.

All told I walked a great deal from the Ferry to the City Centre and around the market so I got plenty of exercise and mercifully the rain held off. Once I got home I thought it a good idea to relax.

Like I say a positive day one way or another.

Day 207

The weather is turning colder. There is a version of Sod's Law which says that if it is a windy day with blustery showers said showers happen when I am out and about and distance from shelter. That happened to me twice today.

It was, though, all worth while because it was a great show on Angel Radio today. My guess was Ian Campbell a self confessed enthusiast for American Jazz and Big Bands. He had chosen 9 such bands, picked the tunes they were most famous for playing and had done some biographical notes. It made for a fascinating 2 hour show. I also got some good feedback from a couple of listeners. Ian will be back in February to do some more. He is a good broadcaster having worked for BBC Radio Solent at one time. He would be a real asset to Angel Radio in my view.

The cough is a bit better today. I got an e mail from the Nurse Joya today. She has spoken to a colleague and they both believe the cough is caused by a combination of a stricture, Reflux Acid and Food Intake. They are waiting to speak to one of the Head Consultants at Southampton General.

Finally a happy Thanksgiving Day to all American Readers of this blog.

Day 206

Things have been a bit better today. Though the dreaded cough is still with me it has not been such a difficulty as yesterday. I can also report that I was able to eat some Spaghetti with red sauce without any problems. This felt like a real triumph.

This morning was weigh day. I have lost a pound since last Wednesday. Also last night gave me the best sleep I have had for about a week.

I took an early decision to miss my Hospital Radio Show. I wasn't sure if my voice would hold up and as mentioned before I particularly want to do tomorrow's show on Angel Radio bearing in mind the work my guest has put such a lot of work into the topic. We shall see how it works out.

On another positive note, I went and booked our ferries for the Christmas and New Year Period. The poor things who run these services are in some difficulty. To operate a half hourly service requires four Boats. The Company used to have 5 available which meant that if there was a breakdown or one required maintenance the level of service could be maintained. One of the ships has been mothballed so there is no spare capacity. Sadly two of their vessels are out of action so we are reduced to an hourly service. At this time of year they can get away with it but if things aren't sorted by Christmas I can see problems ahead.

day 205

From the tone of some recent postings, you may well have worked out that I am getting a little fed up with both the coughing and the continuing difficulties with swallowing.

Taking the cough first, it seems to be getting worse. Up until today I have been able to keep things reasonably under control when broadcasting on Angel Radio. However today was quite difficult. Much as I enjoy the shows, I shall need to take stock. The odd cough or two on air listeners will accept but when it becomes something of a habit people start to get irritated. I hope to be able to do Thursday's show because my guest, a Jazz Historian< has put a lot of effort into doing a session on Big bands their history and signature tunes. As he will be doing most of the talking it should be okay. I e mailed the liaison nurse Joya who said she would have a word with the Hospital in Southampton to see if anything could be suggested.

Speaking of Joya she told me that she was not happy with Biopsy results taking 4 weeks to come through. I really struggled with my main meal this evening. Ev remarked that it seemed at least as bad as when I cam out of Hospital. We await developments.

As you know I do try not to be negative here and I am sure things will get better. However what I can't do is pretend things are okay when they are not.

More tomorrow.

Day 204

One of the things I have to learn is that I need to take each day as it comes.

I woke up in the middle of the night feeling like I was going to choke. As a result I spent some time coughing with great volume. It makes you wonder what can be done to make things better , or even discover there's nothing can be done.

With the weather being as it is, going out for walks is not really an option. To add a little more to the mix, Grandson Adam probably has swine flu. For safety's sake Ev and I are staying away for the moment.

This Evening I am trying to sip water in an effort to keep the cough under control.

Day 203

The good news is that the experiment worked. Not eating after 7.00PM seemed in part to do the trick. In addition to the Liquid Gavescon, I also took two of their tablets one just before I went to bed and one in the middle of the night when I woke up coughing away. Altogether it was a better night. It would be nice to report that the cough shows signs of going away but that is not the case.

The weather does not help. Though it's quite mild, we have had about a week of strong winds and heavy showers. I got caught in one of those on the way back from the paper shop. You know when you are out mid way between the shops and home and the heavens open and you are a long way from any shelter? Yes that happened to me. We must not complain as the good folk of Cumbria have got clobbered really badly.

Still it's been a good creative day. I have put together the music for Tuesday's show featuring songs written by Hoagy Carmichael. I have also booked two guests for programmes coming up in January. There's nothing like planning ahead.

Fingers crossed though that tonight is a better night again.

Day 202

I had a stinky rotten night. I had spent part of the evening coughing but I only managed two hours sleep before I woke up. I went downstairs and sat in a reclining chair. I slept for another three hours. Looking back, I can only come to the conclusion that I paid the price for having a 3 course evening meal. We have mentioned before about the possibility of having the main meal at Lunchtime. This won't be practical on Angel Radio days (Tuesdays and Thursdays)but should be okay for the rest of the week.

We are putting the above theory to the test today. I had a good Lunch and a light meal this evening. I have waited two hours following the evening food before taking my tablet. There will be no more food eaten by me tonight. Just before I go to bed I shall take some more Gavescon. Let us see how that works. I shall report back tomorrow.

The weather though mild is very wet. I congratulate myself on being able to get the Saturday Papers during one of the few dry spells.

Day 201

Though today was a non radio one(slight pun there), it was still a busy day. We were having visitors tonight. Whilst Ev got on with putting the house into order, I went to Tesco to get a few things needed for Dinner. The Island store is about a 5 minute drive away except during the peak Summer Holiday Months when the Council decides to dig the main access road up. It was one of those days when you wish that the store operated a one way system for the aisles and that their trolleys were fitted with wing mirrors. I also discovered that there is a post office on the Island where the post box is about 400 yards away at the end of the street.

This Afternoon because Ev was still busy I went to collect Emily from school. I also went looking for a Birthday Card for a good friend of ours. Those who have Birthdays in November and December deserve our sympathy. Card shops are packed with Christmas stuff so actually finding any Birthday Greetings, still less a suitable one, is quite a challenge.

Our visitors were very pleasant company. Even more encouraging was the fact that for the first time since leaving Hospital I managed a 3 course meal. Of course the portions were quite small but this was quite a significant land mark.

Oh and guess what the Hospital Appointment letter telling me about my visit two days ago turned up today. What the receptionist told me namely that she had typed the letter and sent it for dispatch last Friday was true. However the franking machine date shown on the envelope was yesterday. Quite whether the hold up was in the post room or between that Department and Endoscopy I hope to find out.

Though the cough continues to be a nuisance it has been a better day.

Day 200

From the start I must thank all those of you who have stuck with this blog since my little difficulty was first diagnosed. I am aware that this is the 169th entry but the actual number of days is 200 as stated in the title.

I like to think that through all of this I have tried to remain positive. Yesterday was one of those days I guess most of us get when you just feel pretty low. There's nothing wrong physically but you just feel grotty. It's when that day coincides with somone spraying the back of your throat and sticks an oxygen pad up your nostril that your resolve is tested.

All of that is not intended as justification. Yesterday was not one of my better days and I am not proud of that fact. Today, however, has been much more pleasant one. My throat has suffered no ill effeects from the camera. I was able to do my Radio Show. This turned out to be one of the most testing programmes I have done. My guest was talking about the benefits of Lucid Dreams. I have to confess this is not a subject I know a lot about so I really had to be on my toes. This coincided with the Station's CD players having a wobble and refusing to fire properly. Unfortunately from my point of view I had carefully prepared a selection of music with Dream in the title somewhere and it was all on CD. I did manage to get through the show okay.

Coming home there are two routes to take. The Utilities are digging up the road on both routes. Thus you get stuck no matter which way you go. The journey home seemed to take for ever.

Life could be a lot worse right now but I do just wish this damned cough would go away.

Day 199

To quote the Doctor who did the Endoscopy today there are more pleasant ways to spend the day.

They only partly sedated me and told me that I would be able to see what was happening if not feel too much. I was instructed not to cough but let any saliva dribble from my mouth on to a sheet strategically placed. I have to confess it did cause me some distress. I think the Doctor was struggling to keep his patience. In my defence I was at a pretty low ebb today.

Subject to the results of a Biopsy(4 week wait) the problem seems to be at the bottom of the revised feeding tube rather than the top. What they would like to do is to have me as a day patient and widen the tube in that area. I am assured this is routine for people who have had the kind of operation I went through. The Doctor's own view is that there is nothing malignant hanging around. My only sadness is that I may have to wait until after Christmas before anything can be done.

My weight this morning was unchanged. More tomorrow.

Day 198

I love the NHS dearly but there are times when you want to shake them.

I am due to have an Endoscopy tomorrow. The Hospital had promised to send us a confirmatory letter with instructions. Given that the letter hadn't turned up by today's post, I though I would call in at the Hospital to find out what was going on. The Endoscopy Department at St. Mary's here on the Island is that institutions best kept secret. In other words it's difficult to find. The signeage leaves much to be desired.

Having found my way there I was assued the letter had been sent out by first class post last Friday. Whilst I was there I asked them what they intended to do with me tomorrow. It's alright I was told they are well aware of what happened last time. What they proposed on this occasion was lighter sedation and if that didn't work they would have to think of something else. Evidently there's a 4 week waiting list for General Anasthetic. They asked me if I was okay about it and I indicated I was less than happy but I would at least turn up.

When I got home I looked at the letter. Not only did it say nothing to eat or drink after midnight which I expected but it also said I should refain from eating anything the previous day(i.e. today). I rang them and pointed out that in the absence of the letter I had had Breakfast and Lunch today. After much humming and hawwing they said it would be okay as I wasn't going to be seen until 1.00PM. The only bright side of this is that I had been wondering what to have for Dinner and at least I know the answer.......... nothing. The letter also advised that it may be necessary for them to keep me in overnight.

Whilst I am sure the Hospital did post the letter why on earth in this IT age they can't use e mail for this sort of thing I'll never know.

Right having got all that off my chest, Otherwise I had a good day. My guest on Angel Radio today was great fun.

The distinguished actor Edward Woodward has died. Evidently when Noel Coward first met Woodward he remarked that the name sounded like a fart in the bath.

Days 196 and 197

Apologies Ladies and Gentlemen for getting out of sync. with this blog. We are slowly getting back to normal.

Yesterday I was able to book a guest to complete the line up for December's programmes on Angel Radio. Unlike the BBC, where you have Producers and Studio assistants to do a lot of the leg work for you, at Angel I have to do all the calls, research and music selections myself. It's great fun but time consuming.

Today(Monday) the wind blew again but with nothing like the intensity of Saturday. The dreary cough goes on and on though it does eem to get worse from about 7.00PM. It's difficult to know quite what to do except persevere. The GP told me he knew of nothing to contain the problem other than what I am already taking.

Positively I managed three fish fingers for my tea this evening without any alarms and excursions. We also had good family news. Daughter Andrea has passed her upgrade and is now on course to obtain her PHD next year. She bought a cake for us to celebrate this evening. Sadly I am off the booze just now. Otherwise a drink would have been appropriate.

Day 195

Yesterday we had a day of very strong winds. At the Needles Lighthouse(the other end of the Island to us)a gust of 100MPH was recorded. The worst fate that we had was two of our fence panels blew down. Fortunately we have a good neighbour who we can talk to about it.

I also got caught in a dreadful rain/hail storm. I had only walked 100 yards or so when the heavens opened. In trying to keep my hat on my hands had hailstones bouncing off them. Needless to say, I broke my habit of walking to the paper shop and took the car instead.

So to the cough. Yesterday wasn't as bad as Friday but it did get worse as the evening wore on. Last night wasn't too clever either. I got up at about 3.00AM and went downstairs to the Lounge. I sat up and managed about 4 hours sleep. Honestly I try not to let this bother me but it can be a little wearying at times. Ev is great about it though it can't be much fun for her.

On a plus point, I am making a conscious effort to drink more. As I have said before this has to be managed carefully. If you drink too much just before a meal, you find you struggle to eat anything. The other problem is that the water on the Island is very hard and tastes rather foul. In contrast the water in North Yorkshire seems like manna from heaven.

More tomorrow.

Day 194

Apologies for not doing this last night but we have Grandchildren staying with us for the weekend. Adam sleeps in the office.

I had not one of my better days yesterday. The dry cough has returned with a vengence. No matter what I tried it would not go away. Fortunately this morning things seem better. Certainly I look better.

We heard from the Hospital yesterday. They want me to have an Endoscopy on Wednesday at 1.00. Now some readers will know that the last time I went for that it turned out to be a disaster. I pointed this out but they want me to go for another try. We shall see what happens.

It's a bit windy out there. We have new ferries designed for more reliability to withstand bad weather and guess what.........the service has been suspended until further notice.

Day 193

Apologies for not writing this last night. I got back last night from second Baby Sitting night(the story was Ben 10 since you ask). I was very tired. As is often the way with these things having gone to bed and dropped off to sleep, I woke up early at I guess around 430. If you've ever done that and started getting annoyed with yourself for being unable to go back to sleep you will know what I mean.

I do try in this blog not to sound too negative. There is much to be positive about. I am up and about. I can drive safely. I am not obsessed with personal things taking a lively interest in the worlds of current affairs and Sport. Going back to just before my operation I recall the Anesthetist telling me that in the days and months ahead I would need a degree of mental toughness. To that I would add patience. People who have been through this tell me it takes well over a year to get back to normal. It's less than 4 months since I had my operation.

Now the sharp among you who know me will be waiting for the however..... and you would be right. The cough is back with a vengeance. It is an irritating dry one that is just persisting. Certainly the V shaped pillow is helping in that when I do wake up I no longer have that horrible mouthful of acid and bile. My GP and the Oncologist tell me that there is no cure for this other than to take bot the tablets and Gavascon and as I said in previous paragraph be patient.

We are promised 60MPH winds this evening and tomorrow. Provided it is not too wet it will be fascinating to walk to the Esplanade and have a look at the sea.

My Radio Guest was David Ball the Chairman of an organisation called the Island Games. In 2011 some 4000 competitors will be coming to the Island to compete in a variety of sports ranging from Athletics to Archery. The guy is on the look out for volunteers. Both Ev and I are keen to help.

Day 192

Winter Weather is really starting to kick in. It's wet and chilly out there.

Tonight I was in charge of Emily and Adam as both their Mum and Grandma were out for the evening. The Children are very good really and went to bed as requested at the proper time. Emily has reached the stage in her life where she prefers to read books herself. Adam still likes a story read to him. Tonight his choice was Aliens like Underpants, which I had not come across before. Very funny it was to.

On the food front, I had some Spaghetti with liquidised Bolognaise Sauce. I am delighted to report I was able to eat this no problem. Spaghetti seems to be okay I guess because it is very thin and easily digestible. Not only that but I had a piece of cake and later a small chocolate bar. What I shall have to do is go back to sort of diet I was following when I left Hospital.

I weighed myself this morning and have lost a further 3 pounds. I now weigh some 3 stone plus less than when I went into Hospital. Bearing in mind that my GP said I could lose some more weight some weeks ago this is okay but I am starting to get a little nervous about being under weight. I should add that the current loss is most likely because of what I am not eating rather than anything more sinister.

I got an e mail from Joya telling me that she is talking to two Gastroenterologists to see if they will check to make sure eating difficulties are caused by scar tissue rather than anything else. She will let me know when this is likely to be.

I have often written about the importance of having something to aim for. My next one is looking forward to Christmas and New Year. Nothing is going to spoil that.

Day 191

I spoke to Joya this morning. She said that she would speak to someone from the Southampton Surgery Team and would get back to me. I wait with baited breath.

The problem I am concerned about is that I am struggling with some foods that two or three weeks ago were not causing me any grief. I hope Joya is right when she says that it will be some new scar tissue. I did have a problem with constipation for a few days but that seems to have sorted itself out.

Otherwise everything is heading in the right direction. I had a Magician as my guest on Angel Radio. David Randini(his name) was excellent. He was pleased that the atmosphere was so relaxed. My view on the role of an interviewer is to let the guest speak rather than making it all about him or herself.

More tomorrow.

Dayys 187 to 190

After some setbacks in recent days, it's nice to report some good news. I spoke to the Upper GI Nurse(Joya) who assured me that what I was experiencing was nothing unusual. Evidently as the wound from the operation heals so a new layer of tissue forms. This reduces the size of the reduced tube through which food and drink flows. It is nothing more sinister than that. The Hospital would want to do an Endoscopy first just to confirm nothing more sinister. I can have a small corrective operation to stretch the tube. This could happen more than once. Joya has asked me to keep a record of what I am eating and the degree of difficulty caused. I shall report on progress here tomorrow.

We had a very good weekend celebrating Harry's Birthday. His older Brother and Sister(Jack and Lucy) did sterling work in looking after him at the party. As this date had been a target for me following the operation, the event made a solid impression on me. We are returning at Christmas which should be fun.

Day 186

First the good news. Last night I had an uninterrupted night's sleep. That's two in a row. I feel much better for that.

I did my second Angel radio show today which went very well. My guest was Neve Cullum who is one of the Directors of the United Kingdom Sailing Academy(UKSA). UKSA is a charity that does much good work mainly for younger people from the Island, mainland Britain and across Europe. Neve spoke well and it is an organisation of which the Island in my view should be proud. The show itself is on around Lunchtime and it occurred mainly to Ev that I would need something to have for a meal or snack whilst I was there. So I took a Cup a Soup and some Cheese Quavers with me. That all went well.

Sadly this evening I couldn't manage any Pasta. This follows struggles I have had with Salmon Fillets and Salad in recent days. I am awaiting an e mail from the Oncologist and Joya has asked that in the meantime I don't change any medicines I am taking. I am keeping my fingers crossed. In one sense arguments here about the European Union and Afghanistan that have been raging across the media have proved to be a welcome distraction.

Speaking of distraction we are off in the morning to celebrate Harry's Second Birthday. When we get back on Monday I shall let you know how it went.

Days 183 to 185

Sorry for not doing this blog for last two days. The Decorators have just finished so we are starting to get our house back.

This blog is an attempt to describe how I am feeling at any given time. I am relatively ignorant of the effects from cancer but I have read enough to know that most people experience setbacks along the way. I have been experiencing two of them.

When I left Hospital I was given some Lansoprazole. These Capsules are designed to combat reflux acid. I was told to take one a day. When I saw the Oncologist and told her I was still coughing she suggested I take two a day one in the morning and one at night to help combat the cough. I was concerned that I had been taking two a day when the original idea was to take one. I decided therefore to see if I could manange with one. This turned out to be a bad move. I have had some bad nights waking up with acid and bile in the mouth and coughing. Last night I went back to two a day and had my best night for some time. It must also have been of great relief to Ev not having her night's sleep disturbed by me coughing. We shall see what tonight brings.

The second concern has been that I have been experiencing when eating the same sensations as took place before I was diagnosed. This applied to things like Salad, which up until now I have coped with well. I am assuming this is a temporary blip. Apart from one occasion when I could not stop coughing whilst eating, I have not been sick.

I have sent an e mail to Joya about both problems and hopefully she will come up with some good advice.

I don't want this blog to be entirely negative. On Sunday Afternoon I did a two hour stint as part of the Hospital Radio Charity Halloween Music Weekend. On Tuesday I did my first show back on Angel Radio. It was great to feel so welcome. As I suspect many of you know getting back to my Lunch Time shows was a goal for me and I feel a great sense of achievement. It is also a great relief that I am driving, organising ferry tickets and so on which means I am leading a normal life.

Things will improve of that I am sure.

Days 173 to 182

Welcome to the first post for a week or so. I had planned to do this on Sunday but the decorators were still in. It's a bit of a mess at the moment but I am sure it will sort itself out.

We had a good week. The journey North was fine as we set off early in the morning. By Friday Afternoon the jams on the route we had taken were pretty bad. Coming back on Saturday we were held up by an accident on the M1 but made thew ferry fine. It's still a long long way.

We saw the RSC Production of As you like it, which we both enjoyed. It was nice to visit the Theatre Royal once again. Otherwise we visite two couples who are old friends and saw Ev's two brothers. The village hotel did a very impressive firework display.

Healthwise everything went okay apart from the night time coughing, which happens some nights but not others. It's a matter of trial and error.

It's going to be a busy week as we are off to Grandson Harry's Birthday Bash in North Wales at the weekend.