Days 57 to 64

I am back from our week away at the village of Topcliffe.

The journey up took 7 hours from home and 6 hours driving from Portsmouth. We reflect that the total flying time from London to Toronto is 7 hours. We did have two refreshment stops. We had also taken the precaution of taking various bits and pieces of a medical nature if we needed it.

Despite the fact that Ev drove, I found the journey exhausting. About an hour after we got to our destination I had to go and lie down. We did have some tentative ideas about visiting people but Ev put her foot down and said no. The first two days of our stay were spent sat outside enjoying some warm weather and really not doing a lot. As the week progressed I started to feel a little better. But the really encouraging thing is that I have found swallowing a bit easier. To be sure I still have difficulty with certain types of food but gradually it is getting easier. Let's hope the scan confirms that. We shall find out all about it on Thursday.

Topcliffe itself is a small village about 6 miles from the town of Thirsk. The village has a shop, post office and two pubs. Without a car however you are somewhat scuppered. It's only about 5 minutes from the A1 Motorway. The site where we have our caravan is well kept. We have made some friends there and it was nice to see them again.

So here we are back home. Despite the tiredness I feel a whole lot better than this time last week. More tomorrow.

Day 56

I went for the scan this morning. We set off at 8.05 for an 8 mile journey to the Hospital a journey that took an hour. It may seem odd if you don't live on the Island but at times there are horrendous traffic jams.

The scan was due at 10 but they ask you to arrive an hour beforehand. I was given a jugful of water(not the revolting fluid) to drink. Fortunately I wasn't required to put one of those gowns on. The scan itself involved them sticking yet another needle into my arm. This released some drug which would circulate round the various blood cells to enable them to detect the state of things. The machine had an automated voice telling me when to breathe in and out. It was a woman's voice with a fine Scottish accent(I put that last sentence in for our Daughter in Law Gillian).

Monday night is baby sitting night so we went to Andrea's for tea. Otherwise it was a relatively quite day.

There will now be a break in blog entries. We have decided to go away for a week in North Yorkshire. Both of us need a rest. The only snag is the journey which will take at least 5 hours excluding time spent on the ferry. Where we are going does not have on line facilities so the next blog entry will in all probability be on 1 July.

Best wishes to everyone and thanks for your continuing interest and support.

Day 55

I walked down to the seafront and the ferry wasn't there. I checked with the local news and apparently the ferry was trying to avoid one of the yachts when it got stuck on Ryde sands. Everyone was okay and it got going again with the tide coming in.

The news other wise is better. I no longer have blood in the urine and the bowels seem to be working. All in all it has been a quiet day. We went up to our daughter Andrea's for tea. The children had been camping for the weekend and came home as high as kites. It's amazing you know. You give kids a safe environment where they can run around and play games and they just love it or as Adam said "I adored it."

You know when you think you are sure about something and you turn out to be wrong. We were convinced that the appointment time for my CT Scan tomorrow was 2.00PM. Right I thought nothing to eat for four hours beforehand and only water to drink. That means I can have Breakfast. Ev thought it a good idea to check the letter for any new instructions. Turned out the letter we thought was about the CT Scan was for another appointment altogether. When we checked the letter we found the appointment is for 10.00AM. Not only that but it told us to report by 9.00 so I can drink some revolting liquid. As I have indicated elsewhere in this blog I won't know any results until Thursday 2 July.

Day 54

Touch wood, I may be coming out of the worst of the last few days. It didn't start all that well as once gain there was blood in the urine and peeing was like being attacked by hot pins.

As promised Geraldine returned and did a urine test. Fortunately it showed no infection. She contacted the duty Doctor to give the results of her test. The Doctor then faxed an anti biotics prescription to a chemist. I duly picked the tablets up a short time after.

Ev noticed my face had brightened when I found out there was no infection. It's also a a fact that in two and a half days I shall be rid of the chemotherapy pills for a while at least. I mention for a while because 5 weeks after the operation I am due to see the Oncologist. If a further course of chemo is recommended I would have some serious questions to ask about how to protect the waterworks and preventing constipation. Anyway all that is for the future.

My brother and sister in law spent a very pleasant few hours with us today. We haven't seen them for quite a while so it was nice to catch up and have a natter. Charles is dead keen on types of trains. The Island line uses antique(well 1930s) old London Underground carriages. Photos were duly taken. We took them back to catch the 645 ferry. We got a marvellous view from the Pier of vast numbers of yachts. The ferry was very busy. We found out why. The previous boat in trying to steer round some yachts had managed to get stuck on a sand bank. Oddly enough that would have been the 615 ferry and we had thought about getting that one. Although passengers were on board the grounded boat no one looked in any danger. It's not on the news tonight so I assume all ended well. I shall report tomorrow.

Day 53

I am aware that at the moment there is a certain repetitive theme to this blog with discourses on waterworks and what at some schools they refer to politely as number two. However taking things back to Tuesday night/Wednesday morning, we did have some fun. Because there is more wee whilst you are asleep, the nurse had given us a night bag of bigger size. The idea was to attach this to the day bag, open the day bag valve and voila. Unfortunately e attached the night bag to the wrong part of the day bag. As a result I woke up at 6 feeling like there was a ton weight on my leg. I realised that the day bag was full to bursting and made it to the bathroom just in time. It was one of those situations well described by our good friend Peter as something you would laugh at further down the line but at the moment it was a bit grim.

Anyway as promised we got a visit from a District Nurse called Geraldine. We knew that was her name because she had a huge badge with her name on it pinned to her uniform. She took the bag out and gave me in effect 5 hours to pee or she would return to put a new bag on. Fortunately even though it's quite sore I am managing thus far. In the other matter I have had an attack of the runs.

Enough of this. I weighed myself this morning and have lost 3 pounds. This isn't something at this stage to worry about but it does need keeping an eye open. I mentioned a call from Alan Lapsley earlier in the week. He told me that he had lost two stone following the operation. If I follow the same pattern I would be down to 13 stone(182 pounds). That would not be serious. However if I lose a lot more weight before the operation that might be a bit more problematic.

Tomorrow is the round the Island yacht race in which some 1800 sailing craft sail anti clockwise round the Isle of Wight. It's quite a sight and who knows I might even be able to see some of it.

Day 52

Some interesting news. To various countries in which this little blog is being read, I can add Switzerland. Hello to Kathy and Brian a couple we met in New Zealand in January.

It's been something of a mixed day. I had a much better night now I am getting used to the bag. Bowel movement has also continued. Today we had to go and collect the car from the garage. The guy told us that the reason the front nearside and rear offside wheels were taken was that it was easier for the crooks to balance the car without using bricks.

My brother and sister in law are coming to see us at the weekend so on the way to the garage we called at a farm food shop to get in some supplies. This was the first time this week I had strayed too far from home(unless of course you count the visit to A and E). I also had to drive the car home as Ev was in another car. I got the car home okay but then I felt a little like I had run into a wall. On reflection I should have realised that when I hadn't been feeling all that grand something as trivial as that could make me tired. I haven't been that hungry through this whole episode but at Lunchtime I really felt sick. I carried out my resolution to eat something which I duly did but that was a real effort.

There was and is one other thing on my mind. It started this morning when I attempted to eat a nice juicy and soft nectarine. That is my favourite fruit. Yet even cutting it into very small pieces it was still a struggle to digest. Now move forward to the farm shop. It contained all kinds of goodies that I like and at times past I would have bought. However most of things on display I would currently struggle to eat. This is of course a fact of life and there are many many people much worse off than me with things they can or can't consume but it nevertheless is a sobering thought.

Hopefully tomorrow I shall be able to if you will pardon the expression to pee under my own steam. It reminds me of a sign at the entrance to the Urology Ward at Shrewsbury Hospital. It reads "to pee or not to pee that is the question."

Day 51

Today has altogether been much better. I have been twice today and I am starting to feel a little less nausea. Now all I hope is that wretched bag comes out on Friday.

More impressively I was able to go and get my paper today. The Guy who seems to co own the shop is a very friendly person who always enquires how I am. He means well but oh dear. Someone in my condition perhaps does not want to hear stories of kidney failure. The Island can be a strange place at times.

I am still getting very tired very easily but that I suppose is only to be expected. I finished a rather tiresome book by Elizabeth George. Boy was that hard work. Anyway thanks for all your support. More tomorrow.

Day 50

Things didn't get much better after I had finished the blog last night. It became obvious that my inability to wee and make the bowels move were linked. Rather than have a disturbed night we went to the hospital. Fortunately at that time of night it wasn't very busy and was seen fairly quickly. The Doctor confirmed I was bunged up and said I would need a catheter inserting to prevent infection. The insertion of the catheter took a long time but the Doctor handled it with care. We were given some bags and a couple of suppositories. I was told the Hospital would contact the surgery to explain what had happened.

After an uncomfortable night, a nurse from the practice telephoned to check I was okay and said she would try to visit before midday. I have to confess that I have made a lot of my own troubles. Basically I haven't been drinking enough which means that in the bowel area it has become dehydrated. The nurse said the colour of the urine was too dark and that I needed to keep drinking. I took a suppository this morning which had some effect and the drinking has meant that the old bowels have moved three times today. I am a long way off getting back to normal but (touches head) I think the worst is over. Still feel nauseous though.

The nurse added that the surgery was prescribing me some liquid solution which would help. Provided that bowel movement continued she would be looking to remove the catheter on Friday. I have to say that I have been impressed with the way the surgery nurse has dealt with things.

Most of all though my thanks to Ev who is coping with additional medical things such as catheter bags. She is just wonderful.

And to end on a positive note the car has been fixed.

day 49

They warned me there would be days like this. By they I mean the medical people. Here we are half way through the third lot of chemotherapy and I have the dreaded constipation and have it bad. Despite eating copious amounts of licorice I can't make the old bowels move and it also seems to be affecting my ability to wee as well. This is not unexpected but it does not make it any more pleasant.

Altogether it has not been a very good day. Though I did go for my paper today, I definitely was walking more slowly. The weather was nice but I found sitting out in it very tiring. Add in a bit of nausea and you get the picture. I am sorry if this does not sound brilliant but part of the idea of this blog was to let folk know how I feel and don't worry I am not giving up.

On a positive note, the Police rang to apologise for not turning up the other day and to the guy's credit offered no excuses. An appointment has been arranged for tomorrow. The car insurance rang to say there should be no delay in repairing our vehicle subject to availability of parts and the surgery rang to say the insurance claim form was ready for collection. I also took a nice call from a bloke in Glasgow called Alan Lapsley who has been through all of this and offered some wise words of encouragement.

Things will get better.

day 48

All in all a satisfactory day. On a Sunday I go to a different paper shop which is close to the beach at Ryde. It was really nice in the sunshine. It was an exceptionally low tide which might explain why one of the French Car Ferries was anchored off Portsmouth Harbour.

We went up to Andrea's for Lunch. Ev cooked a fan Shepherd's pie with veg. This weekend sees the Isle of Wight Music Festival, which had another good day with the weather. Martin and Andrea took Emily and Adam with them. There is a lot for them to do in the kid zone.

When it was nearly time for them to return to the festival Ev and I came back home. The paradox of where we live is despite the carry on with the car wheels the area we live in is quite quiet. We were able to sit undisturbed in the garden for a couple of hours.

Once or twice today I have felt a little nauseous but the feeling quickly passes. I definitely feel a lot better than I did at the equivalent stage in the last lot of chemotherapy. How much of this is due to the state of mind and how much is down to me getting used to the treatment I hesitate to say. Also on a good note I seem to be able to swallow a little better. Please keep your fingers crossed that the chemo is actually working.

As another positive thought, I have to say that having a definite timetable of events does wonders for you. As I have remarked before it's not the delay I mind it's the not knowing. It does make my life much easier when they tell you what is going on.

day 47

You may well be relieved that today was a lot better than yesterday not that that took much doing.

There were one or two things that needed getting and preferably from a supermarket about a mile away up hill. Partly because the medical people advise you not to go where there could be a number of folk who might be carrying germs and partly because I wasn't sure if I could make it I hadn't done this since being diagnosed. However as the weather was warm I thought I would give it a go and I made it. However it did make me very weary so I am almost ashamed to say did very little for the rest of the day.

Just as I was remarking how well I had done in not taking anti sickness pills guess what? I felt nauseous tonight for the first time in the current round of treatment. I am not that proud so I took a pill before tea.

That was just about that for the day except to go back to yesterday's events. You may recall that a Police Officer was due to come and see us at 3.00 this afternoon. Did s/he call as arranged? Was there a phone call of apology with an alternative time suggested? Go on have a guess. I definitely feel a letter to the local paper coming along.

Day 46

You know you get in some fan or sports magazine the interview with a famous person and the question comes up who is the person you would most like to meet. You get answers like Tiger Woods, Roger Federer, Paris Hilton(who she?), Nelson Mandela, Martina Navratilova and Wayne Gretzky. Yes well if I was ever asked who I would most like to meet it would be the thieving so and sos who removed two wheels(front near side and rear off side) from our car.

The neighbour spotted it as we hadn't been out the house even though it was 10.00AM. We were both shocked. I think Ev wondered what else could go wrong. Andrea came down to lend her support and I took to the phone. Ev has done wonders but I felt this was one time when I could make myself useful. First call was to the Police. I gave them full details and they gave me a crime number. I then said what happens now. I had expected them to send somebody to have a look. Oh no was their reply we trust you on this. I must admit I was a little shocked and took a while to get my breath. Looking back at this stage you would think she was trusting me not to make a fraudulent claim. It's probably just as well because had I thought that at the time I would probably have lost it. As it was I called back and said that as a taxpayer I had a right to ask for a visit. I added that if this was refused I would take the matter further. I was told they would refer this to the scene of crimes office who would deal with it.

The next stop was the Insurance Company and I have to say I got a better deal out of them. The person handling the call seemed sympathetic. For a start she couldn't believe the Police wouldn't come. The first thing she did was to offer to fill in the claim form over the phone. She said it would take 15 minutes but in reality it was nearer 45 minutes. Because it was theft the excess on the policy would "only" be £100 instead of £250. They offered to ring up a garage on the Island to take the vehicle away and provide us with a courtesy car. This latter point we weren't too fussed about as we have another car anyway. There remained the absence of the Police. We agreed that we would wait for the Police to come and then I would ring the garage.

Whilst on the phone to the Insurance Company a message was left by the crime scene people for me to ring them. This I did and was told that someone would call and test for finger prints within 2 hours. Half an hour later I got a call from Newport Police Station on the Island who said someone would be out to see us tomorrow at 3.00PM if that was convenient. By this time I was getting confused. The scene of crime person would still call. The person coming tomorrow would take statements. The caller then assured me auto crime on the Island was a priority though it may not be in the rest of the Hampshire Force. I suggested they might like to sort their communications out.

Eventually the scene of crime officer appeared clearly nettled at having to call. She told us twice she had a house burglary to go to. Well I am sorry madam but I pay my Council Tax. She dusted for prints and then told us the varmints had worn gloves. Thanks for not a lot. I then rang the garage who came within the hour to move the car. This whole incident began with a call to the Police at 10.10 and we had to wait until 1330 for the scene of crime person to appear. The whole thing was very distressing. Heaven knows how long we shall have to wait for it back. We may need the courtesy car yet. As for the Police I can feel a letter to the local press coming on. Ev spent some time working in the garden as a distraction. She deserves better than this.

I should have known it was going to be a pig of a day when trying to renew my Football Club membership. On line wouldn't work and using the phone I got 10 minutes of your call is important to us. They never answered yet.

After all that my health since you asked, well I weighed myself and found I had put on three pounds in the last week. The meals I ate today didn't cause me any pains at all. I also had a good walk today which did tire me a little bit but otherwise all seemed okay. I am trying to manage without the anti sickness tablets. So far this seems to be working. So it isn't all bad news but this is the second time we have had trouble in the street. Last time it was just vandalism this time we were the victims of a professional group who clearly were stealing to order and yes this sort of thing does go on here on the Garden Isle(Isle of Wight). It's a sobering thought.

Day 45

I found myself today coming up with a good line, "I'm not really ill."

I had better explain. I mentioned in an earlier entry that I had had a bad pain in my right hand side. This had alarmed a fellow passenger on the train in which we were travelling. Well three days into this treatment the same thing has happened. Fortunately on this occasion I was at home. It wasn't a very nice feeling at all. I decided that the best thing to do was on this occasion as little as possible. Ev asked me how I was feeling and my response was as in the first paragraph.

On the plus side I haven't had any more hiccoughs thus far(touches head). The other plus is that I seem to be managing without the anti sickness tablets. As these give me constipation this will I hope help in that direction as well.

I can see why some people do lose a lot of weight during this period. You really have no appetite at all. If it wasn't for Ev saying not do you want anything to eat but rather what do you want for your breakfast/lunch/tea I suspect I might go through a whole day without bothering. The one consolation is that these feelings are not unique to me. Other symptoms include a very dry mouth.

I don't want this to sound like an I am not happy entry. The pain has thankfully gone and I did eat three meals today. We shall see what tomorrow brings.

Day 44

Well here's a first. A blog done at 8.00AM the following day.

To reassure you I wasn't ill just drowsy last night. The dreaded hiccoughs started again. This usually begins the day after chemotherapy visits and lasts for two or three days. Now the tablets they have given me bring on drowsiness. With doing my radio show yesterday I decided to take two of these. There is nothing wrong with that since the box says take one or two tablets three times a day. All went well with the show and we had tea at Andrea's. I managed to eat chicken and mushroom pie without any mishaps, which is good news.

All was going well until we got home. I sat down and couldn't keep my eyes open. To tell you how sleepy I was I couldn't even watch the football on TV.

More on the blog tonight but thus far I am feeling better for a very good night's sleep.

Day 43

Back to the hospital today to start third round of chemotherapy.

St. Mary's Hospital has the same problem most hospitals do namely the parking facilities are woefully inadequate. This in part is caused by the authorities closing clinics and small hospitals down to save money. As elsewhere the Hospital would like to build a multi story facility but the council says no because they wish people to use public transport. For most people on the Island this is not a serious option. The purpose of this rant is to say we arrived at 1010 for a 1030 appointment. As the clock ticked along towards appointment time Ev had to drop me off so I could turn up on time. Eventually she succeeded. One of the nurses told us it is as bad for staff. She once spent half an hour looking for a space.

All that was sort of forgotten about because the chemo suite was very quiet so with the drugs available the staff could get on with it. The whole process took a shade under 4 hours. The first thing they do is warm your arm up. This is to help you cope with the drugs. This time the vein was easy to find. The nurse then started to put in some weird liquid that looked like tomato sauce. This was followed by a liquid administered by a drip. It lasted for 2 hours. With a heat pad on my arm started to feel like a weight was resting on it.

Coming home it was easier than the last two. This is because it is warmer. However the fingers are still getting numb when exposed to cold water. A similar sensation occurs in the mouth when I try to eat anything straight from the fridge. If it runs true to form those feelings will disappear in the next week or so.

All in all the day could have been a lot worse. I hope to be able to do my Hospital Radio Show tomorrow.

Day 42

We had a long chat with the Oncologist today. Unlike last time the Hospital was fairly quiet. The blood test is done as a priority where you are due to see a specialist. That system went well.

Our appointment was for 1120. We showed up 10 minutes before that time and it did seem quiet. We were ushered straight into see Dr. Cave. We had what I can only describe as a very friendly meeting. The good Doctor admitted that if I could detect no easing in my ability to swallow that probably meant the tumour thus far has not shrunk. She did make clear that if I genuinely felt a third session was not what I wanted she wouldn't insist on it. Indeed she actually offered to see if the operation could be brought forward.

Dr. Cave then looked on the bright side and said that if my swallowing difficulties were no worse than before the chemo started that meant the tumour hadn't grown. She also mentioned that the chemo could still have a good effect as far as the lymph nodes were concerned. In any case all would be revealed when I have the CT Scan which is booked for 22 June.

I indicated that though I had had some doubts(as aired on here) I was prepared to go through with the third bout. At the back of my mind was the thought that if an operation proved impossible and I hadn't completed the course I would probably never forgive myself. We agreed a timetable as follows

22 June Have scan.

29 June Scan results available to Consultants in Southampton

01 July Results to be discussed by Oncology Team in Southampton and decision taken on whether operation can proceed

02 or o3 July Joya to discuss with us results and Southampton's recommended solutions.

14 Sept Appointment to see Dr. Cave one month after operation

Back to the needles and pills(almost cue for a song) tomorrow

Day 41

We have been spending a very quite Sunday. Ev had ordered some home delivery stuff from Tesco. As is usually the case the guy turned up on time. The good service image was only slightly dented by the appearance of a carton of soup with yesterday as the best before date. Ev rang them and they took the cost off our bill no argument.

Looking back on the last week off the pills, the good news is that I have been eating better. Sure I still have the problem of digesting certain types of food but this week I have put on 2 pounds in weight. As someone who has been overweight, I still struggle when I hear people telling me that putting on that bit extra is a good thing.

Tomorrow we go to the Hospital to see the Oncologist. It won't be so long a day this time as the chemo starts on Tuesday. Nevertheless we shall still need to be at the Hospital early for a blood test which needs analysing before I see Dr. Cave. I do intend to discuss some of the earlier misgivings mentioned on this blog and we shall see how it goes.

Finally we watched Roger Federer winning the French Open Tennis. I know we Brits love the underdog but it was good to watch a truly great champion. Along with Tiger Woods and David Beckham he must be one of the world's most famous sportsmen.

Day 40

Ev and I had a reminder of what we have missed out on as a result of this bit of bother.

Today we should have gone on holiday to Spain with Christopher, Gillian, Harry, Ian and Lorna. A villa was hired for a fortnight. Who they? Son, Daughter in Law, Grandson and Daughter in Law's parents. They all went today and have arrived safely. For Ev and I alas we have to stay at home. Apart from health, travel insurance is thin on the ground.

Today's not been too bad though. There's been a lot of sport on TV to enjoy, not that I want to turn into a couch potato. Whisper it not too loud but I did actually feel like eating something today. Ev put together a nice risotto and together with a pudding made for a good evening meal.

I had a visit from a man called Noel from the local Methodist Church. We had a very pleasant chat. A man in his 80s, he has a sister who lives in New Zealand. Even though they haven't seen each other very much they communicate via the internet. Thank goodness he wasn't trying to sell me anything. It was very kind of him to call.

Apart from that we have been listening to some nice music on Classic FM. It's important that I gather strength for the third session of chemo starting on Tuesday.

Day 39

Ah the hazards and limitations of the spell checker. Having climbed out of yesterday's bog, herewith today's installment.

We were taking things reasonably quiet, when two blokes came to the door to persuade us to change electric and gas supplies. As I have an aversion to cold callers, Ev handled the matter. Having said it would only take a few minutes the discussion ended some 40 minutes later with the two of them failing to convince Ev it was a good idea. It's a difficult one this because you are aware that the sales people are almost certainly on commission and we all have to earn a living somehow. Equally in our experience changing suppliers has caused us hassle and unless there are real savings it's not worthwhile doing.

In the afternoon, we went to a meeting of a support group. This was organised by the Upper GI Nurse. The turn out of patients and carers was an impressive 36. A local chef prepared some dips and desserts for us to sample. One or two of them seemed inappropriate to us. Sweet Chili sauce seemed the wrong thing for those of us who have difficulty with any kind of sharp tasting food. He also talked about not having too much protein. The nurse pointed out that many of us needed to either stabilise or increase our weight.

The value of this kind of meeting however is that you meet fellow inmates. I had a long conversation with Peter a man who had the operation I shall have four years ago. He was full of praise for Southampton Hospital. He also warned me that in the early stages of recovery swallowing would be difficult. Everything is now fine he said except for eating broad beans and peas.(there's a very old joke about someone not having a pea for 40 years but we won't go there). A listener to my show on Angel Radio came and introduced herself and was very complementary. I can't tell you how things like that boost morale. Ev spent some time chatting to various people as well. It was a worthwhile afternoon.

We came home in good spirits noting on the way that there was a huge traffic jam leading to the car ferry. Evidently the company struggles in what they call high volumes of traffic. It is at times like this that a bridge suddenly seems like a good idea.

Finally I report the following without comment. Our Member of Parliament Andrew Turner sacked a man who worked in his office. The man successfully claimed unfair dismissal and was awarded £10,000 compensation. Mr. Turner claimed £6,000 of that money as expenses that were paid by the taxpayer. The man who was unfairly got rid of had to use the whole of his award to pay his legal fees.

Day 38

Good resolutions sometimeds do not work out in practice. I was about to come and write my bog an hour ago and I thought I would look at the news headlines. Another Government Minister has resigned and divisions within the Labour Party look like tearing them all apart. Politics are very cruel. We did though go and vote in the local and Euro elections. We noticed both the candidates in the local election stood outside the polling station chatting to each other quite aimiably.

In the meantime we have hot water. Yes the saga of the new boiler and British Gas has finally ended. It started with a call from the fitter who was due to come and fix it for us to say that he wouldn't be able to come on Wednesday. I expressed disappintment and mentioned about my illness and no hot water. Anyway to be completely fair to the Guy he rang up his boss and we ended up with two fitters plus an electrician to do the work. It took the three of them half a day to remove the old boiler and fit the new one. The original idea was to have just the one fitter and that would have taken him about one and a half days. So the net effect of this was that the boiler was in place and working at the originally agreed time.

Good news also about Grandson Jack. Having taken Maths GCSE a year early we learn that he is going to start his A level in the subject and he will only be fifteen. The school clearly think he is up to doing not the easiest of subjects. We shall watch progress closely. It has been a busy time for various exams because Lucy has taken some SATS tests and we await the results.

Oh yes and I haven't mentioned anything about my state of health. This is mainly because there is not a lot to report. I am learning with Ev's guidance about what foods that can be swallowed easily and those which can't. We got some very good literature from the Oesophageal Patients Association about eating and also life after the operation.

All in all one of the better days.

Day 37

It's not been a bad day at all. There has been plenty of politics doing the rounds with questions over will Gordon Brown will remain as Prime Minister. Personally I always enjoy situations in which our leaders lose control over events. I forget who it was who said it but the gist of the saying is you can only judge leaders by how they respond when the solids are heading for the ventilator shaft.

I digress. I am still doing the daily walk to the paper shop and taking my time in so doing. It only occurred to me this morning that one reason for feeling so tired so often is my tendency to try and walk at the speed I used to before the chemotherapy started.

This afternoon I presented my Wednesday show on Hospital Radio. Once again I got my timings right. By the way for any of you interested if you are doing a show without adverts or speech content you look to select 14 tracks an hour. This assumes a song lasts on average 3 and a half minutes. Dear oh dear I sound like an anorak.

Though never feeling at all hungry these days, I still enjoyed sausage and mash for tea. The key to eating this is to take my time and cut the sausage up into very small pieces. This is a change from the past.

We are expecting British Gas tomorrow to install a new boiler. They are 24 hours late but at least they told us so we didn't stay in unnecessarily. This could prove to be another welcome distraction. Roll on tomorrow let's see if I can make it another good day.

Day 36

A better day today. First of all I have taken the last of the pills in this round of chemotherapy. Secondly I had something positive to look forward to. Ev and two of her friends go to the mainland on Tuesdays to sing Barbershop. Before this carry on I would drive them to the ferry and come and collect them later as in 10.30PM. Well I was able to do this.

My second goal was to attend a committee meeting in connection with Hospital Radio. I had warned them in advance that I might not be able to attend all meetings if I wasn't up to it but thank goodness I went. There were some interesting points raised and I made a couple of contributions to the discussion.

The really good news is that the station is organising a fund raising venture around Halloween. The idea is that the presenters between them continuously broadcast for 72 hours and collect sponsorship. Now this will be some 10 weeks after the operation but it would be really something if I could take even a limited part, so that is another goal to aim for.

Thanks for all the messages encouraging me to hang on in there. I don't apologise for thinking those thoughts earlier in the week. Barring something unforeseen I can see myself with a needle stuck in my arm in a week's time.

Day 35

This was sadly not one of those better days. I do find myself getting very tired all too easily. The fact that the day was quite warm and humid probably didn't help.

I got e mails from both the Upper GI Nurses both saying the same thing. It is, they say, important to have all three sessions because a CT scan before that is not reliable when it comes to judging whether the tumour has either grown or shrunk. From that I assume the information when the scan took place would affect decisions about the operation or not. In the meantime I continue to have swallowing problems.

For an independent view I contacted a support group help line in Birmingham. I spoke to a very pleasant woman called Dawn. She also urged me to have the third session of chemotherapy. She listened to the timetable of things to happen to me and said that that was the way things were done and that in her experience the three sessions gave the best chance for the operation to be a success. Dawn confirmed what we had already been told namely that Southampton Hospital provided very good care for this kind of treatment. She had had no complaints about them.

We went on to discuss the after effects of the operation. Dawn was inclined to think a full recovery would take 12 months. It would take 8 weeks after discharge before I started to notice improvements. She offered to send some literature to us.

Thus it looks like after my week off it's back to the needles and pills a prospect which does not exactly fill me with joy but if it's got to be that way let's get on with it.

On a happier note our Granddaughter Emily got top marks in all subjects covered by the Sats tests. For non British readers these are tests given to 7 year olds the aim of which is officially to let parents know what standard their child has reached. A more accurate view is that they test the teachers.

Day 34

Having put my thoughts down about chemotherapy yesterday, I actually feel much better. I think it is important to stress how I feel about things but I assure you that I am not looking to pick a fight with the medical profession.

One of the things they don't advise you do is to stay out in the sun for any period. This is a shame as the weather these last three days has been glorious. Fortunately a lot of people have been out presumably enjoying the Beach or the Downs. There have been no DIY noises this weekend. Yipee.

It has otherwise been an uneventful day so I won't for want of an expression tart today's entry up. I have been feeling okay today. Long may that continue.